What is situational Anxiety and anxiety?

We will have to start by defining the latter half of this question first. Anxiety is defined as “a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome.” – Oxford Dictionary…This only can mean that situational anxiety is the exact same thing but is caused by a situation, rather than a predisposition or mental illness.

How Anxiety Affects Me

A crippling bothersome feeling overwhelms me. The constant underlying feeling of losing control. A heavy feeling of heaviness on your chest. I feel just like Giles Corey in The Crucible. Except the difference is instead of saying “More weight” I beg for the weight to be lifted off of me. Anger always seems to get the best of me as I get irritated at the most rational request. On the inside I feel sad and lonely because I am short with people. So I will seclude myself causing even more loneliness. Most of the time it is regular anxiety that affects me. I can’t narrow it down what is bothering me. That bothers me more. Then it becomes situational anxiety because I have anxiety about why I have anxiety. It’s troublesome sharing my situational anxiety with people. I feel defenseless. Putting down my defenses, and sharing everything about myself is almost near impossible. Even to the people I’m closest to. I get my anxiety out by writing in my journal and this blog(Which I haven’t done the best this past week). Other times, which most of the time, I don’t handle my anxiety well. I just pace the floor. I did something different this time and wrote a rap about my anxiety. I used some words that are old English. If you don’t understand them, it’s okay. I knew what I meant and that is what mattered.

My Anxiety Rap

In the distance my reality seems quaint
For the realm I live in, the thoughts, and dreams
Are as I say ever-so far from faint

With my life lack of quate
Or maybe just in my eyes
For in another’s it may be far from innate

Though nobody may ask, I am no saint
But what begotten are the…
These anxieties that act more like a haint

My mind tells me things, they’re taint-
-ed….It only tells me what I could do
Not what I can do, as I said what I caint

My self respect is at all low, that I don’t participate
It never feels good, to have no self love
But what I need to believe, is me, me, I am abstrait

Abstract, abstract is what I am, unique, unique is first-rate
I say first-rate but what I mean is I’m in first-place
If only if I could feel, how I feel when I make others’ elate

What your reading is an abstrait
of My first-rate, my first-rate first-place rap
About my anxieties, how I feel, and how they’re collate-
-ed

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