I’m Justin and Knocking on Heaven’s door is a great statement you could use to describe myself. There was a time in my life where I didn’t care about anyone but myself. Repercussions of those actions never crossed my mind. I became a slave to a heroin and pill addiction which left many people in shambles and left in in the hospital overdosed many times. But I pulled through, being clean since April 20th, 2016, I Justin have pulled through.
“I put on a façade for everyone, that says I was better then I was, and superior to them. In reality I was inferior to the most unfavorable. When you do things that don’t align with your beliefs, they become a habit, and that fixation or impulse is exhausting and troublesome to breach. When I evaluated, revaluated, and revaluated myself over, over time, I improved on my contravening actions and poor portrayal of how a human should act. I still suffer from mental illness and a lack of independence that I want and deserve because of my predispositions.”
There comes a point in everyone’s life where they need to evaluate themselves, and throughout their lives when they need to reevaluate themselves. I have already reached the point of that first evaluation. Probably later than most, however it is never too late to grow and improve on your integrity and character. The two questions I asked myself were, am I the person I want to be? Do you align with your morals and values? This Blog is my attempt to align my actions with my beliefs, morals, and values.
Since then a humbleness has come over me. I care about others and often put them first(to my detriment). I suffer with mental illness. Self medicating is what I was doing while I was using. I just never quite understood the severity of my mental illness. I admire everyone that suffers through addiction, and pray for the addict in recovery and the one still suffering.